sun and blooms. Friday was beautiful.

Saturday, i participated in the Awakening Utah walk: a walk for suicide prevention and awareness.

This was kind of big for me. I mean, i don’t just walk up to everyone and say, “hello, my name is holly and i am a suicide survivor.” In truth, the phrase “suicide survivor” seems odd to me. I mean, i didn’t actually survive the suicide, i was just left behind. I guess that does make me the survivor, but am i really surviving? That rather sounds like the struggle is over, doesn’t it? I find much of the phraseology around suicide odd, honestly. Someone who commits suicide, at least within the suicide circles, is known as a “completer”. This term bothers me quite a bit actually, as it implies a type of success. Rich was troubled by his inability to “complete” his first attempt: “I can’t even do that right”. Rich was very much a perfectionist.

that’s all the words i have for this today.

head of the pack

walking in memory of all forgotten and unmentioned

no shortage of people

i really like the image on the shirt

the back of mine

despite my lack of ability to make a pair of socks that actually fit me, i do swatch.

Exhibit:

from classic elite Boathouse booklet